2015 — The Monster in the Garden: a silly play about Shape Up Somerville

This play was about healthy food and exercise. It featured Professor Nosealot, a professor from Tufts University, who discovers that many children at the Healey School are overweight and unhealthy.

Professor Nosealot and her minions Professor Nosealot visits the Curley School in order to observe what the children are eating for lunch. Someone has stolen the good school food, and the Lunch Ladies only have gray slop to serve. The children do not like the gray slop - there is a food fight! The boys from Groundhogs Somerville show Professor Nosealot their urban garden, and offer to give the Healey School fresh vegetables. Professor Nosealot and the Healey School principal discuss the need for good nutrition and exercise at the school. Rehearsing takes a lot of patience. There is a thief at the Healey School! Someone has stolen the fresh veggies! So the boys build a garden at the school. Lunch Lady captures the thief - it is Marcus Reilly! He just didn't want to eat his vegetables! Everyone celebrates the success of "Shape Up Somerville." In the end, Professor Nosealot finds out why she has such a big nose - she's an elephant, of course! A good friend! At the Somerville Public LIbrary with the real Professor Nosealot - Dr. Christine Economos.

Play Synopsis:

SONG: "Shape Up, Somerville!"

Scene 1: We meet Professor Nosealot and her teaching assistants, Minions 1 & 2, in her office at Tufts University.

Scene 2: In the Healey School Cafetorium, the lunch ladies are getting ready for lunch - but all is not well! What is wrong with the school's lunch?!

Scene 3: Back at her office, Professor Nosealot and the minions reflect on lunch at the Healey School.

SONG: "Dig in the Garden"

Scene 4: Professor Nosealot and the minions go to visit Groundhogs Somerville - an urban-farming program staffed by three very idealistic and enthusiastic groundhogs.

Scene 5: Back at the Healey School, Professor Nosealot introduces her ideas about healthy food and exercise when she finds out that the students have no energy or strength.

Scene 6: Greg the Groundhog visits Professor Nosealot at her office. Professor Nosealot tells him someone is stealing the healthy school lunches and leaving cans of gray slop. Greg has an idea - build a vegetable garden at the Healey!

Scene 7: Groundhogs Somerville delivers the new vegetable garden to the Healey School.


Scene 8: Back in her office, Professor Nosealot has some BIG thoughts.

Scene 9: The lunch ladies monitor the garden at night and solve the mystery! Justice is served!!

Scene 10: Several months later, everyone is celebrating the success of Shape Up Somerville. Professor Nosealot shares her big discovery.

Song Lyrics:

"Shape Up, Somerville"
(Music & Lyrics L. Kitchell)

Shape up, Somerville!
If we don't do it, nobody will!

"Dig in the Garden"
(Music & Lyrics L. Kitchell)

Dig, dig, dig in the garden
Plant, plant, plant in the garden

Pick, pick, pick the tomatoes
Eat, eat, eat the tomatoes

(Music & Lyrics by Wayne Potash / Additional Lyrics by L. Kitchell)

I never had a normal nose
It looks just like a big old hose.
B-I-G! It's big! (3x's)
Her nose is big!
I wonder why it grew so long.
The shape of it is, oh, so wrong.
B-I-G! It's big! (3x's)
Her nose is big!
What funny's, all my family
Have one just the same as me.
B-I-G! It's big! (3x's)
Her nose is big!
So maybe it is not so wrong
To have a nose that's really long.
B-I-G! It's big! (3x's)
Her nose is big!

Wild Tales is funded by a grant from the Somerville Arts Council